Everyday talk- book review

                                                               
Everyday Talk By John A Younts

Another book crossed off my monthly reading plan! This is a short read (and yet still took me about 2 weeks to read!) only 150 pages, but very good. It really made me think about how I talk directly and indirectly to my girls and even my husband. I truly want to be different how how I talk to/ teach my children. The first few chapters I had a lot of underlining going on! That means I was having many "aha moments". This is how the book starts and explains the significance of 'everyday talk' to your children:
"Everyday talk is talk that happens in the unplanned moments. It happens in casual, unguarded moments. It happens when you are distracted or irritated and would rather not be talking at all." 


This book shows you how to do just that. By knowing that your children are watching/ learning/ listening to every remark (good and bad) you have to say about big things like "What's Heaven like?" and "Do I know Jesus?" and little things like "Why does it have to rain today?" and "Why can't I run in the house?" You as a parent have to know God's commands for yourself and let them overflow from your heart out of your mouth.Use these little moments to talk about big things with them. Teach them to obey you not because of the consequences that may follow but simply because God put you in charge. You cannot yell at a child for running in the house only when something bad happens. If that was the rule to start with, he must be disciplined no matter what happens in the end. By only correcting him when something bad happens (or when you have time to deal with it)- you are showing a inconsistent model of discipline as well as classifying sins as big and small when in fact it is all a sin.

There was a disturbing statistic in the book. It said that according the the Indexes of Leading Cultural Indicators- teens talk to their fathers a mere 35 min week and watch 21 hrs of television a week! Preschoolers watch up to 4 hrs day! With all that garbage going in their minds, You know that you are going to have to counteract all that is going in. Satan is all over this world! When you speak to your children in a calm, patient and cheerful attitude it will give you a better chance of having them want to listen. Instead of always nagging them or lecturing them about something; Show a real interest in who they are and what they are talking about.

Chapter 3 was speaking directly to me- "It is hard to be a good listener!!" Yes, I hear what my kids are saying but sometimes it is really hard to take a break from what I'm doing and really listen to them and not brush them off. I just want to say something to make them stop talking for a minute! I think it must get harder for a parent of a teen because as noted previously, they only speak to you a few minutes each day- you want to make it count. You want them to know that you do care about them and what they have to say. For me right now, I know that Isabella will just keep repeating it till I really acknowledge her. Honestly even when I don't give her that minute that age is just so precious because they just love you so much and you are their world. They will just come back in 2 minutes! The teen years are harder because they might not come back....

I am really working on not brushing them off, (especially for silly things like Facebook and Pinterest!) and when I am on, to explain in a patient way that I need a minute and will be with them soon. I truly want to enjoy every moment I have with them. Every mom I meet tells me how fast it goes. I can tell already because it seems as though we just brought Isabella home to our little apt and didn't know what the heck we were doing! Now God has blessed us with two precious girls that fill us with joy every day!

Other chapters in this book included how to talk to your children about the world's deception, music, and sex. Those were interesting, but not of particular use for me currently. I will keep them in my mind for future reference though- I know it's coming up quicker than I'd like! I would highly recommend this book to any parent that really wants to make a difference in the way they parent. Someone who wants to show that Christ reigns supremely in their household.